Friday, September 4, 2015

What is your secret??




My husband and I celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary next week. I was working in the kitchen preparing dinner one evening. My youngest was helping me with dinner. She turned to me and said “Mom what is your secret? “ I thought for a moment not knowing what secret she was referring to. I asked what do you mean honey? You and Dad have been together for such a long time. How have you done it?  I turned to her and explained that the biggest strength in our relationship is God.
I remember making the invitations with my sister and I was thinking God, I want you there at my wedding. Not just on my wedding day, but in every day of our relationship. I want you to bless this marriage. I plan on growing old and grey with this man, but I can’t do it without you. So many times people get married and they forget that God wants to be a part of everything. Even the simple things.
Don’t get me wrong, we are far from the perfect couple. We both came to this relationship with excess baggage and hurts. Another thing is we are both pretty stubborn at times. I believe that the family who prays together stays together. 

We had so many people offer their opinions things like; never go to bed angry, Famous last words “Yes Dear”. Never hold a grudge, Say I love you at least once a day, never make decisions alone.
The best advice we had was from an elderly lady from our church. She said to always keep God first. Keep God in the marriage. She told me that Satan comes to ruin families. What better way to get to a family, then to split the marriage. Prayer is # 1 in your relationship.

I believe that marriage involves 2 people.  I do not see myself more important than my spouse. Marriage is a relationship between 2 people not one. I see so many times where it is all about the wife or it is all about the husband. I believe that putting each other first is very important.   I believe that your spouse needs to see love and respect for them daily.  I am not afraid to show affection. I am not afraid to show him I love him and would be nothing without him. Funny how some people look at that as sucking up. I don’t see it that way. God has built us to want love and affection.  I pray that my daughters learn from our example. I pray that when they are ready and they meet their partners that they know what a healthy relationship is.

When I got married it was not the thoughts of well if this marriage does not work out…
It was this is the man I will live the rest of my life with. This is the man I will grow old with. This is the man I will raise my children with. The man who one day, I will hold my grandchildren with. The man I will die with. For Better or For Worse.

I planned on going through the storms of life together hand in hand. No regrets and no looking back.
So when you ask what is our secret? Our secret is putting God first then, our spouse then ourselves.

All things work out for good when you put God first.